Three Weeks

I have this constant nagging feeling that I can not do enough for Christopher. When he's crying I wonder if he's eating enough, does something hurt, is he happy, can I do more?!? Does he hate being swaddled or hate flailing his arms around more? It's such a guessing game at this stage. He's three weeks old now. It's amazing how fast that three weeks went by. We have had him home for two weeks. Feels like just a few days. Third time around you would think it would be a piece of cake. It's not all that easy.

This week begins a new challenge for me... getting everyone up in the morning and taking Kate to school. Wish me luck. Actually I don't think it will be all that bad. I worry that the baby will cry all the way there and all the way home. So be it. But the crying is SO stressful. Can't I just drive and hold him in my lap like people do with their little foo foo dogs? Except I won't hang him over my arm to look out the window. I'll keep him in the crook of my arm and smother him with kisses. Can't be as dangerous as texting and driving either.

Here are Christopher's feet after the second casts were off just before getting the third casts on. Lookin' good, big guy!

Here's our little turkey on his first Thanksgiving Day!

Life with Christopher

Don't let this preciousness fool you. Our life right now - in one word - sleepless. So he's eating every two hours, sometimes even more often (cluster feedings - forgot about those). Kind of makes everyone in the house a little crazy. Kate walks into our room in the middle of the night - after the baby's been crying - and says, "Christopher woke me up!" Really? You have to get out of bed to announce that? And then we feel obligated to walk her back to her room because the dark hall is so scary. Thank goodness Erin doesn't seem so affected by the crying baby. This little guy cries more than the girls did. Or maybe we just block that out of our memories so that when the next one comes around we are ready for anything rather than expecting the worst.

Kate is a wonderful big, big sister. She LOVES to hold Christopher, even if he's fussy and inconsolable. Erin just asked to hold him for the first time today! She's showing a little more interest in him and all of it is pure sweetness. They both love to baby talk him and kiss him on the top of his silky soft head.

I've been watching a lot of Jon and Kate plus 8. Makes Josh and Kristin plus 3 feel easy. At least I think if these crazy people can do it with 8, I can certainly run a household of 3 kids. Maybe. And we also watch Kitchen Nightmares, makes our frozen chicken patty sandwiches look gourmet compared to what some of those crazies serve in their restaurant. Tonight I heard Josh mutter, "I hope Gordon Ramsay approves." as he set out our dinner.

Speaking of Josh. Other women should envy me. :) He has done everything since we got home. How do I compete with that? It's amazing. I'm so lucky to have him. We're so lucky to have him.

Christopher got his first casts off yesterday (they said his feet already look better) and they were replaced with these heavy, ugly, plaster casts. It was stressful, but we know in the end it's good for him. We are trying to decide whether to go with the doctor we started with or switch over to Shriner's. Yet another decision!

Other than the need to organize ourselves with feedings, appointments, big sisters, etc.... we are doing great and loving every minute of having a new addition to our family!

Right Where He Belongs...

Our baby boy is home! We were able to take him home today after he had a six hour fast to see if he could maintain his blood sugar levels the entire time and then he ate pretty good after that, too. We are so happy to have him home with us. And what a beautiful day to bring him out into the world, the weather was UNBELIEVABLE and the fall colors were extra, extra vibrant today. I think I pointed out every tree to Josh as we drove to the hospital to get Christopher!

Now we are set to hit the ground running with doctor appointments and consultations. There is still not an answer to the weak left side of his face, although a different neonatologist - Dr. Wertz - said today as he discharged us, that he thinks it's something like a facial palsy. Kind of like Bell's Palsy. And he said it may work itself out. That would be great. It's amazing though, how different doctors have so many different opinions!

All that matters now is that our SON is home!!! :)

Updates and MRI Pictures

Our little sweetie pie went to the MRI yesterday. They wheeled him down to the radiology place in a little clear box - or better known as an isolete.

The procedure took an hour and we waited in the hospital room until he was done. Afterward he was very sleepy and we gave him big kisses and left him to rest. Here's his bed in the NICU. The nurses put in a picture of Kate and Erin for him to look at. Or maybe for them to look after him. :)

Great news! Today we found out that the MRI showed normal brain structure. Yay! So now we're still waiting on some blood test results. Dr. Sosa said today that he may just have some things wrong that will work themselves out. Please, please, please let that be what is happening and not something else. Today the nurse stopped his IV that was feeding him sugar water to keep up his blood sugar levels. So we are hoping that overnight tonight his levels stay pretty consistent so that he can come home (he also has to be gaining weight to come home - and those casts added at least a half a pound).

Nice and Not Nice

Nice:
New babies.
Big sisters.
Support of family and friends.
Blankets out of the blanket warmer.
Doctors and nurses with awesome bedside manner.
Doctors that introduce themselves with their first name.
Washing my hair finally.
New babies.
Low blood pressure.
Husbands that run out for non-hospital food.
Stool softeners (c'mon girls, you know this one counts).
New babies.
Staying a night longer because the baby needs to stay.
Friends bearing edible goodies.
Digital cameras.
Healing quickly.
New babies.
Not being pregnant anymore.

Not so Nice:
Belly staples.
NICU
IV's
Some nurses.
Warm prune juice.
C-Sections
Hospital food.
Hospital beds.
Staying a night longer in the hospital because the baby needs to stay.
Going home before the baby.
Medical tape residue.
Bleeding. Anywhere.
Watching mind numbing amounts of middle of the night tv.
Heel sticks and accu-chek.
Casts.
Friends bearing edible goodies (I thought I was going to be able to kick my junk food habit here in the joint...). :)
Sore nipples.
Not driving for 2 weeks.
Pushing the nurse call button a hundred times fast but thinking you're pushing the tv channel changing button. Oops.

Christopher Gets Casts

Here's Christopher getting his first cast on. He was so calm. I would be too if they dipped my pacifier in Sweet Ease (tastes like candy) to keep me happy. Like getting a sweet fix. I also could have used a big ol' Hershey's bar at this time but the nurses were not so accomodating. Just give me an IV drip of chocolate. :)

The second leg getting wrapped by Mike (phys. assistant from Dr. Rubin's office - pediatric orthopedics)

The end result... these casts work to correct the arch in his foot. He will get new casts once a week for the next six weeks. Our little trooper.

Little Boy Blue

Christopher is still in the Special Care Nursery. He first went there for low blood sugar, being that he was born at 37 weeks, he is considered late pre-term. I guess that means he is not a preemie but not completely full term? Something like that. Anyway, when he went to the nursery they noticed that he has some weakness on the left side of his face. He doesn't always close his left eye and when he cries, the left side of his mouth droops a little. The neonatologist (Dr. Sosa) also said it looks like that side of his tongue is also weak. They had the director of pediatric neurology (Dr. Chez) check him out yesterday and he thought it could be Mobius Syndrome. Christopher has bilateral club foot. This particular syndrome that they are looking at has facial nervous system problems and also club foot. Club foot is super easy to treat with casts initially and then braces. It's just to get his little feet to turn out the right way.

Christopher will have an MRI tomorrow. They have also drawn blood and will do some genetics testing that is even more extensive than the amnio we had in July. The syndrome that the neurologist is looking at is a genetic syndrome that can be competely random... nothing we did to cause it. Dr. Sosa is not 100% convinced that Christopher has that syndrome, so we are hopeful that the facial issues are something he will grow out of or that can be helped with physical therapy.

The hardest part of him being in the SCN is that I'm not yet breast feeding him, but I am pumping and we will try to get him to breast feed as soon as my milk comes in. He is getting what he needs through supplements right now, at least. And this helps with his blood sugar as well.

I just spoke with a social worker (came to make sure I was handling everything ok and not going to jump out the window). It was really nice of them to send her. I think she expected me to be bawling in front of her. She would sit there and there were these pauses in the conversation, which I knew meant she was giving me time to say what I needed to say. All I can say is *AWKWARD*.

Also, Dr. Sosa just came by and let me know that the MRI is for sure tomorrow at 3pm. He also is waiting for the geneticist to get back into town so that he can evaluate Christopher. I like Dr. Sosa. Not awkward. The only bummer was he just said the baby isn't eating enough ounces yet. :( So they may have to tube feed him. But more positively, possibly his IV can come out soon.

So that's our little man. I'm hoping he can be home soon. Dr. Sosa didn't know when. And said again that it may not be Mobius Syndrome since Christopher can open and close his eye better now.

I go to Christopher's feedings every time I get a chance. He is such a sweet little bundle I just want to hold him all the time, but he also needs time to rest peacefully. I'll try to post pictures as I can...

Christopher's Arrival

Here he is! Christopher Phillip Ayers was born Saturday, November 8th, 2008 at 8:57 am. He was 5lbs 8oz and 18 inches long. Quite a little munchkin compared to his sisters who were both 8 pounders.

I went to the dr. on Friday afternoon where they discovered my blood pressure to be super high (145/98). They sent me over to the hospital to see if they could bring it down. Then with a few discussions with the doctor on call, we decided to induce because the baby's heart rate was not reacting as it should have (not enough ups and downs). We were admitted into labor and delivery about 10 pm and started pitocin at midnight. Eventually the contractions were strong enough that the baby's heart rate would drop severly with each contraction. At that moment, they turned off the pitocin to get his heart stabalized again. The crazy thing was that a nurse came in to restock the delivery room and then proceeded to tell us that she would see us on her side, which come to find out was the Operating Room side. So that's how I found out the doctor wanted to do a c-section as soon as possible. Crazy...

Let me tell you, I would prefer a vaginal birth over a c-section any time. I think the spinal sucked and the smells of the cauterizing was disgusting. Josh said there was even a little smoke. Recovery is painful and makes me have to stay longer in the hospital than I would have otherwise.

I'm sleepy now... but I will write more later about Christopher and why he is currently in the Special Care Nursery and not rooming in with us... g'night!

Kate is voting for "Rock" Obama. ;) That's my girl. She's ready for change! I hope everyone got out to vote today. No matter what your opinion is...
My vote is for:
Education
Environment
Equality
Tolerance
Peace
and so much more...
We can make a difference. Use your voice. Use your vote.

Rainy Days

It's raining and I will just say I wish it would last forever.
Until I'm tired of it.
Then it can stop.

October's Come and Gone

I know they call spring a time of new beginnings but for me it's always fall. Most likely because I have chosen a career that begins anew each year in the "fall" (and I use the term lightly here because school starts earlier and earlier each year, but I still pretend that it begins in the fall). October is the best, it begins to cool, we finally get some rain - SOME rain - it's time for picking pumpkins, decorating (I only decorate from Halloween through Christmas), costumes, trick-or-treating and gorging myself on sugary sweets. So begins our beginning (?) this year.

We went to Dave's Pumpkin Patch to pick our pumpkins. Erin found a farm road through the fields that went on for about a quarter of a mile. And that's how far she ran. She just took off and kept running. We could only stand in awe until Kate panicked and ran after her. I wondered just how far she would get and knew there was no way I was going to run after her with my baby bump in the way. Kate was able to catch up to her and convince her to turn around and run back to us. She also ran toward a cow behind a fence and didn't stop until she got to the fence, which I might add she could have easily escaped through to the other side. She's crazy. Josh did run after her that time. We panicked a little when the cow decided she didn't like that little thing running at her and charged the fence. Then we went home.

Carving the pumpkins didn't happen until the night before Halloween. Needless to say we've been a little busy. Erin wouldn't touch the guts. Kate was a trooper.

The girls were both witches for trick-or-treating. Kate was a Glamour Witch and Erin was a Pumpkin Witch, or that's what the tags on the costumes said they were. We trick-or-treated our street and into the adjacent cul de sac then Erin was done. Kate and I continued on to the next street where the really scary houses were. She was brave as a five year old can be. The main thing is they successfully brought home the goodies and thus the gorging ensued. And I'm just sick about it... :)